I thought it not just politic but also practical and proper to do a combined review of the three Diwali releases together instead of separately.

The first was “Tell Me O Kkhuda” (“TMOK”), the ardent re-launch, so to speak, of a star offspring who had had an indifferent run — Esha Deol, daughter of Hema Malini and Dharmendra. The second (I am listing them in the chronology of when I watched them) was the over-hyped (and that’s an understatement!) 150 crore behemoth “Ra.One” that was Shah Rukh Khan’s dream magnum opus, a gift, he says, for his son and daughter.  The third is the low-key, much-derided “Damadamm!,” especially after the promos and the massy music that had songs like “Umrao Jaan” and “Kabhi Aar Gaya Kabhi Paar Gaya.” Himesh Reshammiya at Diwali as actor-singer-composer? Give us a break, said his detractors, though the man was confident enough to take on “Ra.One” even when a third release (“TMOK”) was not in the picture.
“Ra.One” was released with 3,500 prints in India and 1,500 more abroad, a record and the best way to counter any negative feedback. The others barely got the shows and the theaters, but decided to make the best of the situation. The detractors, especially within the industry, got ready to rip apart the three films, headed by “Ra.One” of course.

For this critic, the pre-Diwali press screening of “TMOK” was the first. “TMOK” told the story of Tanya (Esha), a young, highly successful writer of bestsellers. Happy in her universe with doting parents, ex-soldier Ravi Kapoor (Farooque Sheikh) and his wife (Deepti Naval), her world falls apart when she accidentally stumbles upon the truth that she is not their biological offspring but a girl who was rescued by her dad from a burning maternity hospital.

Tanya pleads with her dad and mom to allow her to go find out the truth. With boyfriend Jai (Arjan Bajwa) and common buddy Kuki (Chandan), she sets out on the mission — first stop, the Municipal Corporation to check records. From the list of female children born on that day that could match her, the first male parent possible is Thakur Abhay Pratap Singh (Vinod Khanna) from Rajasthan. After it is found that he is not her real dad, there is one more false start, Altaf Zardari (Rishi Kapoor), from Turkey; before the trio reaches gangster Tony Costello (Dharmendra) from Goa and a back-story unfolds.

Finally, Tanya has one biological father (no prizes for guessing), a non-traumatic explanation of why she was adopted, and both the Thakur and Altaf also are present at her church wedding along with Tony and Kapoor — and her biological mother as bonus (no prizes again for guessing the cameo artiste). Why the other two? Because she has reformed the Thakur’s regressive and anti-girl-child stance, and cured Altaf’s wife who has been mentally deranged by the death of her baby daughter! 

Technically impressive, the film is superb in the first 15 minutes but begins to crumble the moment it gets into Rajasthan. Esha Deol needed a far more suitable vehicle to make her career zoom after an indifferent run, but this role lacks even the spunk and pith of her better roles like “Dhoom,” “Ankahee” and others. Dharmendra brings his scenes to life, and Farooque Sheikh is outstanding. The rest are effective but are also unable to rise above the humdrum fare.

The best part of the film is the songs, but they are wasted in bits and parts and minus lip-synch. A wonky and absurd storyline needed a convincing script and deft and sure direction, but this film lacks both. Trying an unseemly blend of the classic mainstream with the contemporary, director Hema and the writers (Mayur Puri again with others) make wrong choices — like the very ‘70s stretched climax, with police coming in after it’s all over — when she should have junked that for a contemporary resolution and used lip-synched songs instead.

And going by absurd screenplays, “Ra.One” takes the cake. A fantasy with a villain being the almost-invincible protagonist of a video game coming out into the real world and unleashing mayhem with the intention of killing his challenger, the inventor’s child Pratik (Armaan Verma), who has inspired his nerdy father to develop the game, needed a strong, gripping script.

And in keeping with SRK’s stature and our expectations of him, the film should have been supremely entertaining as well — but “Ra.One” has and is anything but. The story gets absurd by the reel. The nerdy dad who is disrespected by his son (shades of the very convincing “Toonpur Ka Superrhero”) does not actually become the superhero G.One in adversity — his game avatar is summoned to destroy the virtual monster because dad has been killed by Ra.One.

G.One even gets amorously tempted by his creator’s widow (Kareena Kapoor), but after he finally and tediously destroys Ra.One, G.One has to “retur”’ to his world. But whaddayaknow, he reappears in the end. Sheesh!

The script is riddled with holes and the darkest hole is the 3D, which adds to the mess. The glasses (charged separately) were terrible, and both London and Mumbai by daylight look as if an eclipse and digital imagery have conspired to make things so dark that if “Saawariya” was derided as a “Blue Film” this one could be termed the “Black Movie”! The technical department has gone into overdrive and a train bursts through Mumbai’s Chhatrapati Shivaji Terminus onto the main road in a “Me-too-one-better-than-‘The Burning Train’”-fashion. But dude, instead of being spectacular, you guys have made a spectacle of yourselves!

Yes, a bomb has been spent on making a movie of the kind never before seen on the Hindi screen. The Herculean effort by Anubhav Sinha, SRK and their technical crew could have made this a pathbreaker, but somewhere they forgot the Disney maxim echoed by decades of Hindi cinema that a film has three important aspect: story, story and story. And they also forgot the context of cinema in general — the three legs on which the film sits — script, direction and editing. Add one more compulsion of the mainstream Indian film, namely good music. Where are all these, dudes?

Arjun Rampal impresses in his brief appearances, but Kareena cuts a sorry figure and Khan scores as actor only as the nerd who gobbles noodles with curds. Yes, the kid actor has spunk, but how can SRK be so irreverent and insensitive that he markets a gigantic kid movie and shows the “hero” groping the boy’s mother, and has an item song that goes “My Booty Goes Pop Pop Pop”?

But surprises, as they say, never cease, and the season’s welcome shower in a parched cinematic scenario comes from the least expected quarters. Himesh Reshammiya’s debut big-screen production (along with Studio 18), “Damadamm!,” was one film after watching whose promos a significant section of the audience was not enthusiastic at all (and that’s an understatement). But in a crowded Diwali week, this film comes in as a sweet surprise that reminds us of the halcyon romances of Basu Chaterjee, like “Priyatama” or “Chitchor,” with an added sugarcoated message on relationships.

Sameer (Himesh Reshammiya) and Shikha (Purbi Joshi) both work for a film distribution office and are living in for five years. Poor Sameer is used to Shikha’s nagging and suspicious ways, so when she goes to her hometown Indore for a family wedding for a fortnight, he feels a sudden sense of freedom and becomes an extroverted young man who keeps Shikha’s calls on his mobile at bay as much as possible.

At this point his boss (Rajesh Khattar) brings his sister Sanjana (Sonal Sehgal) to the  office and places her under the guidance of Sameer to learn the ropes of gauging a film for purchase. There is an instant attraction, and Sameer’s friend and immediate boss (Ashvin Dhar) encourages him to break free from Shikha’s shackles and get a life. Soon, Sanjana and Sameer get close enough for her brother to suggest marriage, just after Sameer has broken off with Shikha (who has returned) after she misbehaves with Sanjana after suspecting something between Sameer and her. Shikha seems to accept defeat well and leaves the job. But Sameer cannot understand why he is not happy. And he gets his answer when he comes to know the real reason why Shikha had gone to her hometown.

Himesh Reshammiya has written this simple romantic story with a message. Subrat Sinha’s script makes everything real and relatable, with almost no melodrama and identifiable lifelike characters. Director Swapna Waghmare Joshi keeps matters in tight control and Himesh improves upon his past performances, though he can eschew a few expressions that have become his stock-in-trade, like the overdone conspiratorial grins with pursed lips and puffed cheeks.

Apart from some loose moments in the second half of the film, the editing is tight and the twist in the tale quite convincing. Sanjeev Srivastava’s background score is impressive and Himesh’s songs are used very well, and even sound much better than on the audio simply because they are tailor-made to the situations; even the ludicrous “Mango” song gets by.

Excellent camerawork (Oystein Lundstrom), and impressive performances by Purbi Joshi, Sonal and Ashvin Dhar also lift the film.

Giving the films what they deserve as a rating puts me in a bit of a dilemma, as I firmly believe that even if the genres are different, the ratings within a week have to reflect a comparison of merits. After due contemplation, I award a “ **(Just About)” rating to both “TMOK” and “Ra.One,” and a “ ***” Rating to “Damadamm!”

I consider myself fortunate that I saw that film last, both because it was the only decent entertainer and also because it helped me realize afresh that a nice time is what we all primarily want from a movie, whatever the genre. Budgets, technology and marketing do not necessarily ensure quality. My family happened to watch both SRK and HR on the same day, and the verdict was 4-0 “Thank God we watched ‘Damadamm!’ last!”

That says it all.